Beginnings

Thinking of Changing some things

fall_change

I have been brainstorming. Even if I complain of limited budgets, I realize I have a whole lot more than many people. I shouldn’t be promoting myself, and asking for support on Patreon. (Yes, I realize it is still Summer… just looking forward to Apples and Pumpkins.) I should be encouraging others to do what they can to make a difference in the world.

I have enough. I have food and shelter. Even if I do not get the last job I interviewed for, and it goes to someone else. Perhaps that person needed the job more than me. I can survive on my current budget. If I had more money, I shouldn’t be thinking only of all the electronics I would buy. I should be thinking of the people I can support who do not have enough.

So I have decided if I get the job to anchor a better future world by donating to places like Kiva. If I do not get the job, I will volunteer to anchor a better world.

While it was fun to put on the Spiritual Guro Mask and pretend I know more than I do, honestly the Mask isn’t fitting anymore. There is very little that I do know, even if I have enough intelligence to imitate other who are also putting on the Guro Mask.

I feel that I have spun a lot of fancy words together, but I have helped no one in doing so. I want to create a community of volunteers. People who, instead of putting on the Guro Mask, encourage each other to do they best they can to change the world.

There is no sign-up for this community, all you need to do is what you can towards creating this Golden Age history has spoken about. I created a Kiva group called Matt Kahn’s Angels. I continue to have no success in getting anyone to join Kiva. Yet, that is fine, everyone can do what they feel called to.

I have watched the below video four or five times now. It is so amazingly complete and eye opening. I’d say that if you are going to watch just one Matt Kahn video, this would be the one to pick.

I watch it and realize, much of my watching of Divine Cosmos with David Wilcock was a clever form of gossip. I realize that even if I am not complaining online, a lot of the Internet talk applies to me.

So I ask myself, What am I really doing with this Blog? In my view, even if I never made money, I have had a successful Blog.

It was a fascinating dive into the Spiritual world. I stood on the outside a long time before jumping in. Yet, I am no longer spending money on Bashar videos, Crystals (except as gifts), and might never get another Reading.

I will likely be paying for the next Angel Academy, and whatever Matt Kahn offers on Beyond the Ordinary in October. I have concluded the Matt Kahn has the message that has healed me the most.

I am a very abundant person, who has been lucky enough to escape unharmed from many situations. I could have easily ended up in debt, considering my mental health issues in the past. I could have harmed myself 10 years ago when I tried to kill myself, but I escaped undented. Now I am perpetually healing. Slowly I am coming out of my shell.

I have this interesting combination of being openly honest and secretly guarded against other humans. I can talk for hours, yet still, be guarded against really opening up. The easiest way to explain is that I might be on the autistic spectrum.

I could have gone to a community volunteering opportunity on both Wednesday and Friday (today). Yet, I stayed home and surfed the web instead. I so actively want to change the world, but when it comes to really doing it, something is stopping me. Even if I go out into the world and meet people I don’t know all the time, when doing something new my shell can still overcome me.

Just donating to Kiva, doesn’t feel like enough, yet for now, it is the best I can do. Considering I do not have a car to drive donations to charity, it really is the best option until I am ready to be more active.

I started out so bold in this post, and in the end withdrew. I am tired of pretending to be what I am not. I don’t want to wear any mask, even that of ‘pretend’ boldness. If I were in a bold mood today, I would be out helping others and not writing about it.

Categories: Beginnings, Matt Kahn

Tagged as: , , ,

3 replies »

  1. I appreciate the honesty of this. I never got a guru vibe from you. You just seem to share what interests you. I am certainly not a guru, and tend to be skeptical (although interested in their views) of people who seem to be spiritual know-it-alls. Maybe for now just sending out good vibes to people will help you feel like you are helping the world. Simply being kind can really make a difference a little at a time. Have you ever opened doors for people who didn’t expect it or let somebody with only a couple of items get in front of you in the grocery store line? Many will smile and give sincere thanks because it shows them that there are still courteous people in the world.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s