Beginnings

The Path Continues…

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I had a long break from normal everyday life, in that I was too ill for so long to work. My resume does not look the best, and a majority of jobs don’t call me for Interviews. I do have confidence issues when it comes to certain kinds of employment, as I seem to exist on a different speed then others.

I have always been slow, and could have done much better on my college entrance exams if I had managed to finish more of the questions. The ones I did get to were mostly right, yet my pace too slow to get to the end. As different factors have added to this slowness, from dulling brain medication to long periods outside of the hustle and bustle, it become increasingly obvious that traditional employment is not right for me.

I don’t want to be the employee that everyone complains about being too slow. Yet, when I try to work at normal pace, I make mistakes. I used to worry greatly about my slowness. Now I am at a job, where it is okay to be slow at what I am doing, as a majority of it is seating and waiting.

I want to increase my abundance, usually one would imagine this coming in dollar form. In many ways I have abundance, but quite often I am limited by not having the money to get something. So I enter sweepstakes in hopes of temporary, or long term escape from this. I want to increase my income, but the ways offered for me to do this, are not following my passion.

I have a passion for certain kinds of writing, and sometimes art. Art is very temperamental with me, and there were a great many years were I was unable to bring myself to do art. Now I can only do it while listening to audio.

As you can see, I have not created new artwork in two weeks or so. I am in absorption mode in a way. I am listening to Bashar talk about following Passion, and contrasting it with what Matt Kahn says.

Matt Kahn’s concept is a little unconventional, he says until someone can support you Full-time, it is a hobby. Work is a chance to integrate energies, and anchor positive intentions. You don’t necessarily have to be in your dream job, in fact you could hate your job, but use it as a chance to overcome judgements.

Basher is all about acting on one’s highest passion in every moment, and the universe will support you.

So which do I do? Continue searching for jobs that I don’t really want, that I just want the money from? Do I focus my time and energy following my excitement by doing things like Blogging, and not knowing how this could ever support me?

Which way does the Universe work?

I have been putting products on Zazzle.com, but do not know if I will ever be able to sell anything. At the amount of profit for each item, I would need to be hugely successful to earn an income from Zazzle.

Yet, I have been putting my artwork out there this week. I have stopped putting it up on the Internet without a Watermark for free, as if it had no value. I have been bold enough to say, my artwork is worth something.

I have acting on my excitement more. I invested in my Blog, saying to the Universe my writing is worth the investment. When I get home, I will spending my time to put images on posts (because I took all my non-watermarked art down).

I have invested not just time into this Blog, but now my money, again. Each time I spend some of the money I was saving for the iPad Pro, I have to deal with doubt. Will following my excitement really result in abundance?

It is nice to hear that all you need for abundance is to follow your dream. Now we are not talking solely of monetary abundance. Part of me is hoping for a miracle, to happen and provide me with the money needed. That an image on my Zazzle might become a best seller getting me the audience all in one swoop. That the Sweepstakes for $5,000 I entered would be won, proving to me that the Universe does award following excitement. Finally there is the winning of something bigger, for one or all, to provide me with a lifetime of not having to worry about money.

Perhaps it is time to take part in the process of facing one’s definitions of Abundance that come with Winning the Lottery. This is a requisition from the part of myself writing this to  my Higher Self. Please, consider Winning the Lottery. For I think it is safe to say, one always wins the lottery, but not always in the way you envisioned. I got that statement loosely from Bashar.

I will have to wait till next week to act on that request, as I am at my parents house right now. They think I am still saving money, and were wondering why I got them a gift of a big bag of Michigan Dried Cherries.

They would be so disappointed that I lasted so short a time in saving money mode. They worry about my future… likely more then I worry about my future. I tend to worry about how I am going to get something in the now. For now I have enough good food, and a warm place to live. I have family to Love, and a dream to follow. These are many kinds of abundance. Why is it that just one representation of what I don’t yet have, can take me so far way from the abundance I do have.

I am an abundant person. I have an abundance of words (as you can read), I have an abundance of necessities that would make following my dream possible. I have many things that even the richest man may lack. I certainly have an abundance of ringing at the moment.

(Creating new artwork will also have to wait until I am home. I don’t have a chair to work from right now, I am typing from bed. Yet, I do intend to make a few new images for the site again. They will just be watermarked.)

Categories: Beginnings

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